According to a National Health Interview Survey, 18.4% of senior adults have experienced symptoms of depression. While the majority of these adults have mild symptoms, it’s still an issue that shouldn’t be ignored.
“Depression is a significant concern for older adults and it’s not uncommon for them to underreport their symptoms,” Kathryn Kopp, LCSW at Phoenix Rising Psychotherapy, told the AJC.
Kopp cites the stigma around mental health as a key reason seniors hold back talking about depression, yet she finds that once she gets people talking, they’ll express certain fears.
“I often hear clients voice fears about being a burden to their families or feeling that they should be able to handle their struggles alone,” Kopp said.
Jocelyn Chen Wise, LCSW at Emory University’s Fuqua Center for Late-Life Depression, said although there is a genetic component to an increased risk of depression, situational factors play a key role in depression at this age.
“Things like physical health issues, financial stressors, loss of a spouse or dealing with a fixed income can all come into play. It’s not always one clear trigger, but more like a soup,” Wise told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution.
Knowing what signs to look for in your aging family members can help you begin to talk about depression before it gets severe.
“Common signs of depression include mood changes, altered sleep patterns, withdrawal from social activities, neglect of personal care, increased anger or irritability and expressions of hopelessness,” Kopp said.
Symptoms may even manifest physically.
“People may see increased pains and aches or even cognitive changes like forgetfulness or feeling slowed,” Wise said.
If these changes go on for more than two weeks, or interfere with day-to-day life, it’s time to have a conversation about depression.
Approaching the talk
Recognizing that someone you love may be facing depression is hard enough, but talking about it can be an even bigger challenge. Kopp suggests offering support without trying to fix the situation, even if that approach feels unnatural or uncomfortable.
“The first step in addressing depression with an aging family member is to simply listen. Let them know it’s OK to express their feelings and that you are there to support them,” Kopp said.
Wise suggested opening with an observation about their mood to sound less confrontational.
“Try to be as non-accusatory and nonjudgmental as possible. You don’t want to lead anyone to think you think they’re unwell or crazy,” Wise said.
If you still feel stuck, the Patient Health Questionnaire-9 may help keep your conversation in a constructive path.
“The PHQ9 is written in an approachable way that you can weave into a conversation with someone else to assess without it feeling aggressive and while still looking concerned about how that person is feeling,” Wise said.
What you can do to offer support
After that first conversation, it’s important to stay on top of the issue, but you don’t necessarily have to hound a loved one about how they’re feeling. Sometimes just being present and supportive is all it takes.
“Showing consistent concern is good, as well as expressing love and encouraging they get help if needed,” Wise said.
Kopp highlighted how much activity and connecting to others can help.
“Regardless of age, individuals with supportive, loving relationships with friends and family consistently report higher self-esteem and greater overall happiness,” Kopp said.
Kopp also mentioned the importance of treating loved ones with dignity.
“As we age, it’s natural to experience changes in our bodies and cognitive abilities. It’s important for us to continue feeling valued and appreciated. We want to be treated with respect and spoken to like adults,” Kopp said.
If you live further away from an aging loved one, and are concerned about their mental well-being, helping them seek out professional support is another way to be there for them.
“Partnering with a qualified and experienced therapist can have a profound impact on alleviating depression symptoms,” Kopp said.
Regardless of how you support an aging loved one through any feelings of depression, it’s important not to be afraid to have that initial conversation. Make sure they know you care, and you’re there for them.
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