Ever feel that you were a hot mess? I guess that’s the new way of saying, “I think I’m having a nervous breakdown.”
All around you Murphy’s law is in full force, and you are honestly having a hard time believing that so much could go wrong so quickly. This year could only be better, right? But you’re still having a hard time.
It hasn’t been a total disaster. There have been some victories: maybe you have a new job or a new place to live that are nicer than where you were before. Perhaps, like me, you were able to extricate yourself without too much fallout from an entanglement that was quite toxic.
Perhaps you had several crises that were unexpected. Health issues and sometimes problems with the kids or relatives can throw a wrench into the works and make life difficult. If you are in the Sandwich Generation, it can be very tough taking care of both kids and aging parents. But it is important to take care of those you love and who cared for you when you needed them. You should feel good about yourself for doing it.
Other times it can seem like everything around you is breaking: the roof may be leaking or maybe the kitchen sink. On a more serious note, problems at work could be causing financial worries.
It can get a little scary to venture into the world or to even open up your email, but you must know that all is not lost. You have gotten through a couple of other dark times. They happen to most of us, sometimes for a couple of weeks, sometimes for a couple of years, but you have to learn to make the best of it and seek help where you can. Trying to do everything yourself when you are not at full capacity can be very tough.
Truly, no matter how bad your life seems, there are other people who have it worse - and remembering this can give you some perspective. So the next time you feel overwhelmed, just take a look around you, and see if you can find some balance. You may find that your problems are not so big after all. They can be reframed as “challenges” or inconveniences that are just making it more difficult to navigate your life at the moment.
I know that comparing yourself to others can be a trap in which you end up feeling sorry for yourself. But that’s not what I’m talking about here. This is about being grateful for what you have. Opening your eyes in this way will give you a greater understanding of exactly where you are and can inspire you to pull yourself up and reclaim the life that you deserve.
When bad things happen to you, be thankful that you will have another day to fix what’s gone wrong. As long as there is air in your lungs, you can make your life better. Seldom perfect, but usually better.
Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D., is an award-winning psychotherapist and humanitarian. He is also a columnist, the author of 8 books, and a blogger for PsychologyToday.com with nearly 35 million readers. He is available for in-person & video consults world-wide, reach him at Barton@BartonGoldsmith.com
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