Heather Mendenhall never fully realized how tumultuous the marriage between her mother and stepfather had been until it was too late.
By then her stepfather, Alec McNaughton, 60, was standing trial for stabbing her mother 31 times. He was convicted of murder and aggravated assault in August and sentenced to life plus 20 years in jail.
Through the trial process, Mendenhall realized her 54-year-old mother, Cathy Mendenhall McNaughton, had been embroiled in an abusive relationship. Friends, family, and even Cathy McNaughton herself had missed some of the warning signs. Mendenhall doesn't want that to happen to anyone else.
She will speak Thursday night about her family's ordeal at the Partnership Against Domestic Violence's 10th annual Silent No More candlelight vigil.
"I definitely feel like it is the right thing to do to honor my mom and potentially help other women," Mendenhall said.
At first, Mendenhall said she found her stepfather to be "really nice," even though she was apprehensive about their speedy courtship. The couple met online and married in 2006 after only six months of dating.
When one of McNaughton's daughters died in a tragic car accident during the first year of their marriage, the couple's relationship seemed to go downhill.
During a fight one morning in the driveway, McNaughton dragged his wife out of her car and across the driveway. She suffered abrasions and bruising on her arms, legs and face. She also had to miss a few days of work, Mendenhall said.
Mendenhall was concerned, but her mother reassured her.
"Mom said she had taken care of it, and that they had consulted with his doctor and maybe it was a result of his grief," Mendenhall said.
As the years went on, Mendenhall said her mother also told her she had uncovered some lies McNaughton told her about his financial troubles and past business dealings. Their relationship became further strained because McNaughton, a former attorney and recruiter at a law firm, was having difficulty finding steady work.
Cathy McNaughton told her daughter she was going to divorce her husband after graduating a program to become a financial adviser with Edward Jones.
"She had told several people that she really could not handle it," Mendenhall said. "She thought the marriage wasn't going to go anywhere."
Cathy McNaughton graduated the program on Feb 13, 2009.
Two days later, her husband called 911 and claimed he had returned to his Sharpsburg, Ga., home to find Cathy McNaughton "unresponsive and bleeding." Coweta County investigators later determined that he killed her, using phone logs, computer records and eyewitness testimony to debunk his alibi.
Three of McNaughton's ex-wives testified at trial that they had been abused and threatened by him in the past.
Mendenhall said families need to intervene and seek help when they suspect a loved one is being abused, even if they are only aware of one incident.
"She told her friends and me some information, but not one of us knew everything that was going on in the relationship," Mendenhall said.
Partnership Against Domestic Violence is calling for an end to violence against women at this year's candlelight vigil, said the nonprofit's spokeswoman Susan Berryman Rodriguez. October is National Domestic Violence Awareness month.
The vigil is from 6 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. at the Martin Luther King, Jr. National Historic Site at 450 Auburn Ave., in Atlanta. For more information, visit www.padv.org. Help for victims is available at the organization's the 24-hour crisis line 404-873-1766.
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