Steamy enough for you?

Massive heat-index meltdown is predicted this week, but we who do not think long enough before making promises to children managed to find the hottest place in metro Atlanta last weekend.

An estimated 400,000 locals and visitors climb 825-foot-tall Stone Mountain every year, so we were hardly alone as the temperature topped 90 and humidity eclipsed 60 percent on the virtually shadeless side of the world’s largest granite outcropping.

Here are some thoughts and questions that passed through a dutiful parent’s increasingly delirious mind while climbing into thick air:

1 Uh-oh. It’s only a 1.3-mile climb to the top and I’m weirdly winded after a dozen steps. Steady thyself — this isn’t Machu Picchu!

2 Those scattered, smothered and covered hash browns sure smell good. Wait ... that’s my arm burning!

3 At least I’m not the only person gasping for breath. Folks in better shape than me are fighting it, too. Misery does love company!

4 Just wondering: Is there a cardiologist in a box somewhere on this path?

5 The view of Atlanta that opens up as hikers approach the summit (1,683 feet above sea level) is awesome, but the dingy air has Jimi Hendrix’s “Purple Haze” playing in my ear.

6 Must tell otherwise charming 10-year-old son to please ... pipe ... down. One-word grunted responses to his nonstop queries are getting harder to deliver.

7 Happiness is ... finally reaching the top. Today, it feels like conquering Mount Everest.

8 If it costs $3.79 to buy the kid a small Arctic Blast (Warning: captive audience pricing!) in the snack-ateria up here, how much for Dad to lodge his head under the handle and cut the frozen goodness loose?

9 Does the park’s Summit Skyride cable car sell one-way tickets ... down? Actually, the descent turns out to be a relative walk in the park.

10 Just smile when the 10-year-old proclaims: “This was fun. Let’s do it again next weekend!”

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