My late brother-in-law was a quiet man. He was known for being ā€œquick to listen… and slow to speak.ā€ If Donnie was curious about something, he strategically waited to ask the right question at the right time.

Whenever we visited, my husband, sister-in-law, and I did most of the talking. Donnie would sit quietly, rarely offering insights into our discussions. But when he did, everyone would listen. He was usually comical, quick and point-blank. You did not have to wonder what he thought. Truly, that was one of my favorite things about him.

We were discussing a situation one day, and he made a comment that made me laugh. But since then, I have repeated the maxim at different times, realizing the truth behind it:

ā€œGod is often blamed for things he never said,ā€ Donnie said in his matter-of-fact tone.

Since that day, I have often witnessed situations that made me recall his words. It’s true – to justify certain decisions, it is not uncommon for even the most faithful believer to convince himself that God approves of attitudes or actions which undoubtedly contradict biblical principles.

Let’s face it – who has not deceived himself into believing that bad decisions or actions were acceptable, even God-honoring. Whether it’s justifying why we cannot forgive someone, honor our parents, put an end to an immoral relationship, you name it – most of us have compromised clear principles, calling sin a good thing.

Now, there is no question that there are decisions we make and certain subjects concerning God’s will for our lives that are significantly more subjective. The Bible does not tell me what I should do next in my ministry or whether I should take that job. We must patiently seek answers such as these through prayer, godly counsel, and then wait for the ā€œpeace that surpasses all understandingā€ before moving forward.

However, for any believer who claims to ā€œlive by the book,ā€ there are times when we must remove our hearts from the equation before making a decision, lest we become blind to the dangers lurking behind the pretty face, or the devastation waiting around the corner as we take the wrong turn.

The prophet Jeremiah warned Israel about the deceitfulness of one’s heart. His words ring true still today:

ā€œThe heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?ā€

In his commentary on this passage, 17th-century minister and author Matthew Henry explains:

ā€œWe cannot know our own hearts, not what they will do in an hour of temptation (Hezekiah did not, Peter did not), not what corrupt dispositions there are in them, nor in how many things they have turned aside (…).ā€

It’s true – given the right condition, our emotions can lead us to paths filled with pain and devastating consequences. And those committed to being led by God through life must realize that he is the only one who truly knows the future and that certain situations or people may ā€œlookā€ good but are not his best for us.

We face decisions daily. Many will bear minimal consequences. Conversely, the ripple effects of certain choices that may look inconsequential at first have the potential of utterly altering the course of our lives or altogether destroying them.

May we learn to listen to God more carefully, telling our hearts to be still and take the time to sift every decision through the grid of his word. As we do, we will realize that many things we thought he said were nothing but the voice of a deceitful heart.

ā€œOne’s philosophy is not best expressed in words. It is expressed in the choices one makes.ā€ — Eleanor Roosevelt.

Patricia Holbrook is a columnist, author, blogger and international speaker. Visit her website www.soaringwithHim.com. For speaking engagements and comments, email pholbrook@soaringwithHim.com

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